Friday 18th July, 2014

I was woken slightly early this morning to streaks of lightening, claps of thunder and torrential rain and for the brief moment before the evil iPhone alarm went off my thoughts turned somewhat despondently to camping.  I don’t think I have told you before what I am up to this summer.   It’s not that I am totally against sleeping “rough”.  After all it was me that mooted the idea of a family glamping moment at Lah-titude, a somewhat genteel music festival in Southwold, this very weekend.  That was met with a resounding no from all other members for a variety of reasons.  But explain please how it is that I ended up agreeing to go fishing with Bob in the Arctic Circle and sharing a tent with him for five days.  It is an appalling prospect.  Aside from the inevitable discomfort for certain too the Arctic Circle is a cold, inhospitable place and if I’m not eaten by a polar bear the midges will have me.  Three weeks from next Tuesday we are off to Stockholm, fly to Kiruna from where to be helicoptered into the middle of nowhere and dumped by some wretched lake in which the occasional brown trout and a lot of grayling are supposed to reside.  Oh deep joy.  I can’t even stand fishing. 

 

At least we will be taking a tent.  I got home on Wednesday evening.  No sign of Bob.  I was told he had headed off a couple of hours earlier to spend a night under the stars with a sleeping bag, his dog, Weasel, a folding poachers .410 shotgun, some water, dog-biscuits , a couple of cans of baked beans, a book entitled “Food for Free” and a box of matches.  No phone and needless to say, no tent.

 

His thirteen year old sister Lottie has accompanied Bob on several of his adventures and when she revealed she thought she knew where he would have gone too, she and Hen decided they would try and find him to wish him good night.  That’s weird enough in itself.  It was a couple of hours later and after 10pmwhen they returned in near darkness but in high spirits.  They had found him and shared what was left of a couple of pigeon breasts and some baked beans.  Hen in particular was full of it.  “He had built a neat camp site in the middle of a wood and there was a lovely ambience ( was the very word she used ).  He made a candle for us using a fire lighter placed in an empty can.”  I know you think I make these things up so here is a photo.  It rained in the night, but that was fine apparently “ I had a coat “ he told me, somewhat bemused at my concern,  the following morning.  I have such strange children.